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Online Dating
Dating Online – Can Be
Less Stressful
by Martin Smith
Dating is a challenge at any age and for both women
and men. Ladies worry about your hair, your make-up
and whether you look fat. The men worry is their
tie straight (if they wear one), do they have enough
money, and whether or not you will like him. Basically
both sexes are worrying about whether they are liked
and accepted.
Believe it or not there are things that you can
do to make your date less stressful. Make your date
feel comfortable. If you are throwing questions
at your date, they may feel like they are on trial.
Let the conversation happen naturally and most of
your questions open-ended. This means that while
yes and no questions while used sparingly, are fine,
they can lead to stilted conversation and tension.
Talk about all kinds of topics and try to engage
your date in the conversation. Never force conversation.
Here’s one you hear all the time. “Relax,
be yourself, you’ll be fine” Share your
interests but listen to your date too. Both of you
will probably be nervous so try to relax. One of
the most important things you can do is be on time
either to pick-up your date or be ready to be picked
up.
There are things you should definitely not do on
a date. Don’t talk about yourself all night
and don’t complain and whine about your ex,
your date will wonder what you will say about them.
Don’t ask too many questions-it’s not
the Inquisition. Don’t be late picking up your
date or in getting ready. Most importantly, don’t
forget to thank your date for a good time.
Dating is about getting to know your date and letting
them get to know you. Try doing something different
that you haven’t tried up until now. Alternate
deciding where you are going, it could relieve a
lot of tension and you just might learn something
very interesting.
One other very important, in fact, it could be most
important, is dating safety. There are so many ways
to meet someone now that it’s fairly easy for
anyone with less than good intentions to be able
to follow through on them. The suggestions that
follow while addressed to ladies, men pay attention
because reality is, is that you too could be a target.
For the first few dates go to public places and
not isolated ones. If you are meeting someone that
you have been talking to online there are several
things you can do to keep yourself safe aside from
meeting in a very public place. Don’t go alone,
have a friend or two go to the same place and sit
where they can see you and your table at all times.
You might consider this even if you have met your
date already. The nice guy you met at the library
may seem sweet but he may not be. If you have any
kind of uncomfortable feeling, listen to your gut
and do what you have to do to be safe.
Try to learn about your date. Where does he live?
What kind of work does he do? If he doesn’t
want to tell you I wouldn’t consider dating
him a second time. He may be very nice and the most
loving person but be careful if he won’t share
some personal information. I suppose giving too
much information could be a warning signal too.
You’ve heard of date rape drugs well they can
not only be put in alcoholic beverages but in soda,
tea, coffee, or water. Actually they can go in almost
any beverage. This is one reason to have someone
you know nearby so that if you leave the table they
can kind of keep an eye the table (and your date).
Watch how much alcohol you consume. You want to
keep your wits about you at all times and if you
are driving this is even more important.
Use any safety devices that you can (and ones that
are legal). The most important tool anyone can have
is a cell phone, whether man or woman your can break
down or be in a crash. The cell phone will bring
help that much quicker. You should have it programmed
so that you only have to press one number for 911.
Many can be programmed that when you hold down a
particular key 911 is automatically dialed. Most
cell phones have GPS capability. Pepper sprays,
high decibel personal alarms are two more safety
tools. Check with your local police and attorney
to see what is acceptable in your community. Many
areas have banned pepper sprays.
Other general safety advice whether dating or not
is never go anywhere unfamiliar alone. Always wear
your seatbelt. If someone grabs you with a weapon
and ordered to go with him or her it is suggested
by some that you take a stand right away. Scream,
yell, bite, or kick or do anything you have to do
to become safe.
Go for the groin and the eyes. Shove the heel of
your hand into the assailant’s nose very hard.
Yell Fire!! People will react to fire rather than
help.
This next thing is something to do in almost any
situation not just dating. When giving out personal
information to someone be careful how much you tell
them.
I remember when keeping yourself safe wasn’t
such a serious matter. There are new ways to overpower
someone and to cover up a crime. Keep yourself safe,
and lastly always let someone know where you are
planning to go and if you can the person that will
accompany you.
(c) www.no1-dating.com
Reprint Rights feel free to publish this article
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About The Author
Martin Smith is a successful freelance writer providing
advice and tips on a variety of subjects if you
need tips on Dating Online His numerous articles
provide a wonderfully researched resource of interesting
and relevant information. http://www.no1-dating.com.
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